Two snarley vessel popping growls out of five...

 So the X-Men drought is over.... and God I wish it wasn't. I won't spoil the actual movie for you it does that just fine on its own. Thankfully, we only paid $6 at a suburban theatre instead of the local theatre. I would have been mortified if I had to pay $10 for this movie. There are SOOO many issues with this movie, I don't know where to start.

1. Growling is only good in moderation:
Yea, super heros grunt, growl, snarl and make loads of animilistic noise. I mean, Venus and Serena grunt hitting a 3 ounce tennis ball. Grunting is fun since it fits in just fine with the themes of "Origins" except its taken just a wee bit far. How far? Lets make a simple analogy. You need to cut down a sapling in your back yard and you use enough dynamite to bring down the RCA Dome to accomplish that. Yes... its so over the top, the infamous "Darth Vader NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" will no longer be the laughing stock. And some of these growls are just... nasty, you can almost taste the snot in the actors throats... but alas, this is a minor complaint... (Even Cyclops screams, and child Wolverine has a terrible yell that makes it laughable). 

2. And so you thought Live Free and Die Hard was over top...
So a car going into a helicopter is kinda unbelieveable. But this movie tops any of those moments.... yea you can pull the super hero card, but just watch it and you'll see what I mean....It also involves a helicopter. Overall this movie just tried way too hard. Yes, I got it, you have powers, but must you flaunt them and make the movie even MORE outrageous? "Origins" answer is a yes....

3.Plot... meh... 
Without going into too much detail, the plot ends up being ENTIRELY irrelevent and renders the movie for the most part pointless. Characters have shallow motivitions, almost no development (especially my favorite character of the X-Men series Gambit), and you could have even just called 95% of the characters "Someguy #1" The beginning scene in the movie where they must obtain something in an office in an Africa, although a good scene to display powers, was utterly pointless. They killed 40 people and really I honestly think a phone call would have sufficed. They even had a love interest that was TOTALLY bland and pointless. Plot was also horribly predictable. Story was kinda lame and the twists really had no impact what so ever.  

4. Holy cow Hugh, Lay off the 'roids
Before you get all pissy, he probably didn't take steroids, but damn, they bulked him up just a bit too much. He'd probably pop a vien by sneezing. It was just a bit too muscular. When he wakes up from a nightmare and grunts very loudly and awkwardly, he has veins poking out capable of landing small aircraft. He's just too muscular and it was kinda gross.

5. CG design using a PS1....
Seriously... look at Wolverine's claws and they SUCK. And one character from the movies is CG'ed (kinda) into "Origins" and its creepy, ewwwwwwwwww. Not sure where they went wrong, the CG effects of the original X-Men Series wasn't bad, but now...  ugh....

6. Why did you put that guy in there?
Sweet, so they put cyclops in the movie... not really necessary... 

7. The "After The Credits" scene... POINTLESS!
I'm going to ruin it for you because its POINTLESS (although there are two endings). After the movie, Wolverine is at a bar drinking and talks to the bar tender saying he's drinking to remember... thats it. I actually said out loud in the movie theatre... "THATS IT!?!" and a bunch of people around me laughed and shook their head in agreement. (The other ending isn't much better)

8: How stupid are you....
Soooo many illogical character decisions. Here's just a few...
A ) I'm gonna try and punch you despite knowing that you are like Wolverine and can regenerate.... 
B ) I'm going to stop you from killing the person I want you to kill for all my suffering, and after I stop you I will help you get to him and try and kill him again... 
C )  Despite the fact that I have a plane that can land in water, I'm gonna make you ditch out at over 150 mph.


And for a spoiler-filled review that only justifies my rant...

2 out of 5. Don't see it... wait for Star Trek